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Sunday, 29 July 2018 05:54

How to talk to a friend who is experiencing infertility – consider Ukrainian Surrogacy

By Rachel Nania  — One in eight couples has difficulty getting pregnant.

That is a statistic Andrea Syrtash knows all too well. The relationship expert and author has been struggling with infertility for seven years, during which she has seen eight doctors for a total of 18 treatments.

“I call myself an ovary achiever,” Syrtash joked.

Making light of a heavy topic has helped Syrtash navigate the often isolating and painful path of infertility. After realizing that a little bit of humor and nonclinical content could help others, too, she launched Pregnantish, an online magazine that tackles the topic from a real perspective.

“To me, making it accessible, making this conversation not scary, not clinical all the time, is part of my mission to break the taboo of infertility,” Syrtash said.

A common issue Syrtash discusses on the site is how infertility impacts relationships.

“It stresses relationships in the biggest way,” she said.

“It affects your friendships, your work relationships, your family, your community, the relationship you have with your partner and with yourself.”

If you have a friend or family member who is among the 7.4 million women to receive fertility treatments, Syrtash has some tips on how to best offer support during a stressful time.

Banish the words ‘should’ and ‘just’

Syrtash’s first rule when it comes to supporting a friend experiencing infertility is to nix the words “should” and “just” from your vocabulary.

“When you say words like should and just — “You should just adopt,” or “You should just get a surrogate” — you’re unintentionally casting blame on the person that may have this physical disease. And you’re saying you’re not doing enough,” she explained.

Don’t offer advice

Another major no-no is lending advice — no matter how helpful you believe it is.

“If someone’s been through infertility, especially for years, anything you’ve thought of, they’ve thought of 10 times over, so it’s not a new idea,” Syrtash said.

The best thing you can do is listen.

“Ask questions and listen,” she said.

Be transparent

Syrtash often gets asked if friends going through IVF or other fertility treatments should be left off the invite list for events such as baby showers and children’s birthday parties. Syrtash understands the good intention of not wanting to inflict pain on a friend, but said being left out can be even more hurtful.

“I think it’s really good to just be transparent. When you’re close to someone, you can say, quite transparently, ‘I want to support you. What’s the best way I can be there for you?’ And let someone answer that question,” Syrtash said.

Your friend may want to take a sabbatical from regular hangouts, and that’s OK. Syrtash said a little self-care and some R & R from the social scene can be a good thing.

Experiencing infertility? Find support outside of your relationship

It may sound strange, but Syrtash recommends couples who are going through infertility find support outside of their relationship. Confiding in a friend or family member who is not so emotionally, physically and financially affected is the way to go.
“It’s really important to share, as much as you’re comfortable with, share with close connections what you’re going through so that you have support, because so many people feel like they’re going to burden someone,” Syrtash said.

Learn more about international surrogacy:

Delivering Dreams helps couples throughout the US struggling with infertility have children. Located in NJ and Kyiv, Ukraine, our amazing medical facilities and professionals, surrogates and donors are in Ukraine, because Ukrainian law protects the rights of parents and their children from inception at affordable costs and high success rates.

Unique to Delivering Dreams, we offer guaranteed not to exceed, all-inclusive pricing and contracts under US law to provide prospective parents legal and financial security.

1 in 6 couples are struggling with infertility. You are not alone. We want to be your path to parenthood.

Would you like to learn more? Please contact us to share your challenges, ask questions and discuss solutions. This email address is being protected from spambots. You need JavaScript enabled to view it., www.international-surrogacy.com, 1.908.386.3864.

International surrogacy made simple!

Our upcoming book, “Successful Surrogacy: Your Guide to Realizing Your Dreams of Parenthood Through Ukrainian Surrogacy” reveals the process, details and answers to empower you to start your Ukrainian Surrogacy Journey and ensure it will be an affordable, secure and happy experience.

Pre-Order your advance copy today! Our book is FREE, but the results will be PRICELESS!

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Testimonials

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Doyles
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The team at Delivering Dreams is amazing! Their attention to detail and ability to put your mind at ease while growing your family is like none other. They handled everything for us, and I never once doubted they would help us accomplish our dreams.
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I’ve known Susan for several years now, and I’ve always been impressed by her attention to her clients’ needs. I’ve known her to work ardently and diligently to solve whatever challenges, no matter how unique, that prevent her clients from completing their families. She is a problem-solver, and she earnestly believes in providing the best options and in making surrogacy opportunities realities: this is not merely a business for Susan. She will help customize the process for your needs and to ...
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Mary Woods
Susan has a keen sense of business and goes to the max to solve her clients’ problems. She is super knowledgeable on business, laws and how things work in surrogacy in general, and specifically on Ukrainian surrogacy. She is an advocate for transparency in a market that’s often opaque and full of hidden risks. I really enjoyed working with Susan. She really pays attention to detail and was always looking out for my best interest above all. Highly recommend!
Laurie Tham
Delivering Dreams goes above and beyond what other surrogacy agencies offer. After speaking with Susan, I see how they anticipate every part of the process, down to details that I had never even considered. I didn’t know what I didn’t know! Surrogacy can be really complicated and confusing. What an amazing sense of relief to have a company so dedicated to managing the WHOLE process and taking away as much of the stress as possible.
Kate Varness
I have gotten to know Susan through a group where we are members. I have found her to be a genuine and caring person. Her consideration for others and love of her work with Ukrainian surrogates and parents-to-be are evident in all her decision making. She is passionate about being a force for the greater good and helping where she can. I have been amazed at the way she is able to smoothly navigate the complicated maze of requirements in the surrogacy process. I am happy to give her my highest...
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Rose Anne Barbour Huck
Susan Kibler is kind.  She clearly loves those she works with and loves what she does.  Susan listens deeply and compassionately and can make you laugh all in the space of one conversation.  She is wonderful!  If you are feeling worried, she'll hear you.  If you have questions, she will find answers for you. If you need help, she does her very best to support you.  I feel so fortunate to have found her and imagine you will too.
Frances Russell
Susan has the ability to really connect on a personal level quickly.  I have found her easy to talk to and have been so grateful for her guidance.  She is one of those people who offers so much to her clients.  She sees the big picture and has a heart for the most intimate concerns.  She is highly skilled and able to manage what can certainly be challenging and uncomfortable experiences, making them feel easier.  She will take charge at the perfect times and guide you when you really need her...
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Susan Seare
The international surrogacy world is complicated. Susan Kibler knows its ins-and-outs. She knows the people and outfits you can trust and the ones to avoid. She insists on the best for her clients and handles the details so they don't have to worry about them. If you want to take the international surrogacy journey, you can trust Delivering Dreams International Surrogacy Agency to guide you on that path.
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Polina Clend
Susan is passionate about helping people become families. She is a trustworthy confidant to have on your side.
Kristen Ancker
Our experience with Delivering Dreams has been overwhelmingly positive. The team seems to be genuinely dedicated to helping us to realize our dream of having a child. The constant communication leading up to the trip and the numerous touch points made us feel comforted in what has been a very challenging and uncomfortable situation. We always had streamlined communication through the group chat and was frequently checked on during our stay.
Marilyn

Under Ukrainian law, surrogacy is a legal affordable option for traditionally married couples to have children using their own embryos, or with either an egg or sperm donor. There must be a medical reason you can’t carry a child. You are also able to participate if you have had 4 unsuccessful IVF attempts.

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Under Ukrainian law, surrogacy is a legal affordable option for traditionally married couples to have children using their own embryos, or with either an egg or sperm donor. There must be a medical reason you can’t carry a child. You are also able to participate if you have had 4 unsuccessful IVF attempts.